Superbowl Sunday

Like I give a flying fuck! Ahh yes, the most watched American event of the year is upon us...it's Superbore Sunday...I mean, Superbowl Sunday...! But let us break down this cultural phenomenon for what is really is, shall we? It's a day where fat, greasy Americans lay on the couch, eat 7 layer dips, scratch their balls, and beat their wives. What could be more American than that??! But seriously, someone needs to explain the "significance" or "masculinity" of a whole bunch of men running around in tights, throwing a "big brown ball" at each other, all while trying to "tackle" the opponent where one's crotch ends up being in the other's face. Let's not mention the gratuituous bending over where balls are flung into the arms of another man. And the finale where they all end up in a big group shower and slap each other's ass. No no, I am not pitching a show idea to Bravo or the Playgirl channel...this is American football! MmHmmm...