An Open Letter

Dear Ms. Fantasia,

I want to say that I've been a huge fan of yours since the powerful and stirring song, Baby Mama. You gave hope and light to us single mothers. I am especially moved by these lyrics.

I see you get that support check in the mail

Ya open it and you're like "What the Hell?"

You say, "This ain't even half of daycare"

Sayin to yourself "This here ain't fair"

These lyrics are so amazing and provocative. I feel...Solidarity. Promise. Wonderment.

However, I want to say that I was quite confused by your performance last night on American Idol. I don't quite think that shade of menstrual blood quite suits your head. The clown makeup was a bit confusing as well. And Ms. Fantasia, if I may ask, exactly how many pills did you take before that number and please, may I have your pharmacist's phone number? I have questions and concerns.

You may have fallen off the wagon, but please get on a city bus, or short bus.

Your Baby Papa,

A Drunken Socialite